I will give all credit for the title of this to my friend Francine. She is the one that gave me this quote once upon a time and I like it,so I'm using it!
Right now, since I'm not working, I've decided that I'm a 'practicing housewife' without the kids...or ring....but you know...practicing.
I'm not exactly sure what a housewife should do on a daily basis. I have a feeling I'm not quite cut out for this lifestyle. I mean, I really enjoying doing nothing but things I want to do all day. I can read books, watch brain numbing tv shows, do my homework, and NAP. I love napping. But something tells me that there is more to this actual housewife thing. I know there are many women out there who would read this, appalled and disgusted at me. They'd go on and on about what a housewife actually does, and tell me I don't know what I"m talking about. Well, no shit I don't....That's why I'm practicing.
I'm going to use myself a case study to decide if you can make a ho a housewife! I think I may be doing okay! I don't go out everynight like I used. I rarely party anymore. I read books, get the mail, do homework, cook, etc. Basically, I'm a boring version of what I used to me. I still wear totally inappropriate outfits while I do these things, so I'm not totally lost :-) And I'm ok with it. I could even say I like and enjoy this more peaceful life I live. I like sitting at night on the couch with the boy....each of us reading a different book until one of us falls asleep. Ugh...I'm so boring. I swore this wouldn't happen to me. But I also swore I would never become a borderline fat chick...and look what happened there. I guess I am wrong sometimes!
Onto the case study:
Here's what I just got from wikipedia, I will use this description of a housewife in my analysis of how I'm doing:
"Housewife is a term used to describe a married woman whose main occupation is running the family home—caring for her children, cooking, cleaning, etc.—and who does not work outside the home. Merriam Webster describes a housewife as a married woman who is in charge of her household."
- Married Woman: I'm already failing here since I'm not married. Hmm... (-1)
- Caring for Children: Ummm, yea...don't have those either, but I have my cats. Maybe they count? They are continually following me around, wanting attention, crying, wanting to be fed, played with, etc. Does this count? In my book it does and I say this just so I don't become a total failure as a housewife.
- Cooking: Well, I do cook sometimes. I'm not incredibly good at it. But I don't burn everything and I haven't given anybody food poisoning. So I guess I pass this test. Plus, I've been trying to cook every night. And I've been trying new things. Last week, I think I cooked almost every night! One night was sheppards pie, then chicken (with crispy skin too!! that was big!), then macaroni salad to go with the burger the boy cooked on the grill, and I'm pretty sure I made a few other things I can't remember right now.
- Cleaning: Well, my house doesn't look like a bomb went off. The dishes are clean, the counters are clean, the laundry is folded and put away most of the time. But there is dust. And I could probably do better. But damn, who the hell wants to clean? We've had some great days, and I'd prefer to sit by the water in the sun and read a book! And then on these dreary, rainy days? Everybody knows they were made for being lazy. Laying on the couch, watching movies, napping, etc. I don't want to ruin this tradition by cleaning!
- Etc: Umm, I don't know what that means! When the boy comes home should I be waiting in a lacey outfit & hooker heels? Ready to drag him to the bedroom and show how grateful I am that he worked all day and came home to me? Oh yea baby. Quick...we have 15 minutes until dinner is ready! Not sure if I'm totally failing here....it may be a matter of opinion....some days I do this....not often though. Usually if I did something really bad during the day and I know the boy might kill me!
But it also says a woman who is in charge of her home! I think I got this one down! I am a housewife!
So I guess maybe you can make a ho a housewife??!!!